coming on here to write what I can't on facebook

To be melodramatic, etc. etc. Not feeling very good about being me at this very moment. Got a shit PWA, marketing, feel like I'm wasting my time here and will become increasingly so frustrated I'll explode. This is not why I came to this school. Maybe I'll never be a manager, maybe I just suck at it. I haven't felt creatively fulfilled or creative approaching anything since living in Israel. I've forgotten how to be inspired, how to be creative. I just feel empty where that muscle used to be. I know, I'm sounding ridiculous. But the truth is I haven't ever felt so alienated from theater. Maybe it's because I'm not actually doing it. I feel so trapped and rudderless right now. No doubt I'll learn some important skills from sitting behind a desk in marketing all year and blah blah fucking blah, but this is not why I moved 6,000 miles away and came to school here. Not at all. I just gotta keep my eye on the prize: take the MFA and go far, far away from here.